At the moment, I am looking for an additional female renter. So I advertise in some local publications, hoping to catch the eye of an acceptable college student.
I got an email today from a very promising candidate. She is almost too good to be true! Please see her email below (and my commentaries in red):
On Thu, Nov 19, 2009 at 1:16 AM, susanna pattersonswrote:
How are you doing today? Well, I'm just fine, thank you for asking, susanna pattersons!
I'll like to take the place you have for rent . Well to tell you a little about myself, i'll be coming from the U.K.(formally based in California Fountan valley } So are you from the UK or are you from California? Because both those places speak English pretty well, which you do not. I don't think i'll be able to meet you or see the place but if you could send me pics it would be very helpful , What a bummer! I really would've liked to have done lunch before you moved in. i'll like to sort out the payment before coming, don't worry if you say the place is okay i'll trust you. With all the dishonesty and cynicism in the world today, I find this refreshing. I'm a missionary student. I love basketball, I love cooking and reading also. I'm coming for a 10 month missionary assignment. So is she coming to convert Shaquille O'Neal? Rachel Ray? Maya Angelou? I have a Sponsor here who is willing to make a 2 months advance payment via in order to secure the place. HEY! I have a brilliant idea! Why don't I send her my bank account info so she can pass it along to her Sponsor, and he can direct deposit it!!
Pls if this is okay with you pls get back to me as soon as possible. Pls.
To tell you a little about myself, Because I care. I'm 25years old, I am a graduate of Oxford University. Oxford University. Which has clearly lowered its academic standards since I last checked. Grammar? HA! Not for us Oxford Grads! I am also a member of the UNICEF org. , I trick-or-treated for them when I was seven. mostly tour round African and European countries.Please I'm sorry, I don't have any reference there, mostly because I'm lying and I never did that but my Sponsor is a Rev. in the U.K. The Church address he is working is The Methodist Church Home Mission Division, 1 Central Buildings, Westminster, London SW1 H 9NH. Why does SW1HNH kinda look like a flu diagnosis to me???
He is more like a parent to me. He has been taking care of me since I lost my dad, that is, since when I was a kid. Unfortunately, I can't remember the dear Sponsor-Rev.-Who-Is-Like-A- Parent-To-Me's name. But don't let that stop you from giving him your money. After all, I lost my dad, that is, since when I was a kid.
Pls get back to me ASAP. You betcha, Sooze. ASAP.
Thank you. Susan...................
The only way this lady could be any better is if she had discount handbags which quality are good. Right Jessica?
On Thu, Nov 19, 2009 at 1:16 AM, susanna pattersons
How are you doing today? Well, I'm just fine, thank you for asking, susanna pattersons!
I'll like to take the place you have for rent . Well to tell you a little about myself, i'll be coming from the U.K.(formally based in California Fountan valley } So are you from the UK or are you from California? Because both those places speak English pretty well, which you do not. I don't think i'll be able to meet you or see the place but if you could send me pics it would be very helpful , What a bummer! I really would've liked to have done lunch before you moved in. i'll like to sort out the payment before coming, don't worry if you say the place is okay i'll trust you. With all the dishonesty and cynicism in the world today, I find this refreshing. I'm a missionary student. I love basketball, I love cooking and reading also. I'm coming for a 10 month missionary assignment. So is she coming to convert Shaquille O'Neal? Rachel Ray? Maya Angelou? I have a Sponsor here who is willing to make a 2 months advance payment via in order to secure the place. HEY! I have a brilliant idea! Why don't I send her my bank account info so she can pass it along to her Sponsor, and he can direct deposit it!!
Pls if this is okay with you pls get back to me as soon as possible. Pls.
To tell you a little about myself, Because I care. I'm 25years old, I am a graduate of Oxford University. Oxford University. Which has clearly lowered its academic standards since I last checked. Grammar? HA! Not for us Oxford Grads! I am also a member of the UNICEF org. , I trick-or-treated for them when I was seven. mostly tour round African and European countries.Please I'm sorry, I don't have any reference there, mostly because I'm lying and I never did that but my Sponsor is a Rev. in the U.K. The Church address he is working is The Methodist Church Home Mission Division, 1 Central Buildings, Westminster, London SW1 H 9NH. Why does SW1HNH kinda look like a flu diagnosis to me???
He is more like a parent to me. He has been taking care of me since I lost my dad, that is, since when I was a kid. Unfortunately, I can't remember the dear Sponsor-Rev.-Who-Is-Like-A- Parent-To-Me's name. But don't let that stop you from giving him your money. After all, I lost my dad, that is, since when I was a kid.
Pls get back to me ASAP. You betcha, Sooze. ASAP.
Thank you. Susan...................
The only way this lady could be any better is if she had discount handbags which quality are good. Right Jessica?
10 comments:
I like you wire me $ too. I go to Oxford shoe store. That good, no?
What the junk?
What's with you hating on the Nigerian princesses?
Dang. She's a fraud?
I just sent her my bank account number. She is supposed to pay me 1,000,000 for helping her imprisoned priest of a father wire her money...
I think she sells Viagra too.
Aw, I had my oh, so clever, comment planned out as I read...but you beat me to it with your hilarious closing line.
I was gonna say, "You should rent to her...it would be so nice to put a face to the person that hacked into Gramma Pamma and Jessica's e-mails.
I belly laughed at your lines written in red. My favorite was, "With all of the dishonesty and and cynicism in the world today, I find this refreshing."
Did you EVEN CHECK to see whether she had good quality handbags, because, while maybe not great rental material, you could be really missing out on a great purse or diet pills...
Wow. There's no question that she is brilliant. No? Atleast she passed the idiot test with flying colors.
WOW! That is crazy! I'm glad your cockoo radar went off before you became a story on Dateline.
She graduated from Oxford!?!?!
What is wrong with people in this world?
You are just cold, I mean her dad is dead, lady. Where is your compassion????
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