The Organized Apple Doesn't Fall Far From the Structured Tree

You may or may not have noticed by now that I'm a skosh on the Type A side. I mean, I'm generally a likable person, but I truly crave structure and routine. I'm a stickler for natural consequences, and rather consistent about applying them.

Guess what??

So are my kids. Of course, they're also envelope pushers and limit testers, but they understand rules. May I point you to exhibit A:

She stayed up until 9 last night defining her "expectations" for both herself AND the remaining family members. Here, on yellow paper, we see "Parent Expectations", or the rules set forth by the parents:

1. Do not go play or go get ice cream when parents are gone!!!

2. Do not go in backyard (when parents are gone).

3. Read slinlently or play an actvanty slinlently too!

4. Call if in an emergency!

5. If get angry, take belly breathes to 1,2,3 or go to my room.

6. Be kind to others not be mean do not plus say hurt feelings or bad words.

7. Be safe, be respectful, be kind, be responsable ride safely always were a helmet when ride your bike or motor scooter.

8. If someone is coming fast on their bike when a person is riding their bike straight and other going sideway be careful we had a bike crash with Erian and Kamari. Erian got hurt she fell and crash into Kamari then Noe had to go tell Ilyasah, tell about what happened to Erian.

8. If you are riding your bike in the driveway or street, watch out cause cars might be comeing to a person house or to their home.

Follow us at our home or facebook on the web. Noe can do this!

Of course in the name of justice and equity, there is an accompanying sheet of Noe's expectations, or rules she would like to see implemented, spelled out on green paper for your reading convenience:

1. Do not play piano cause hurts my ears or might distract me and my BFF thinking.

2. Stay out BOYSZ! expect Skip, mommy, BFF or a bro or sis or Kamari.

3. Eat nice and play right. Be nice do not be rude, mean or be a bully.

4. Be safe be kind be polite and nice!

5. Ask Noe nicely to play PlayStation.

6. Were helmet to ride our own bike or motor scooter or scooter.

7. Let me take care of something and let me be frist.

8. If don't still understand, ask Mrs. B or A *(that would be me... you can call me Mrs. B, or you can call me A, apparently)

9. I expect everyone to play nicely and put things away apropretly.

10. Follow directions.

So there you have it. Do you think you could survive in our house?? I promise, we're actually a little bit fun in spite of our obsessive ways...

How to Manage the News of a Deployment...

...in Ten Not-So-Easy Steps



My husband left this week for Afghanistan. He's only going for a few weeks, but it's in preparation for a deployment that begins this summer. That one lasts a whole year.

Here's how this works, at least for me.
STEP ONE: Live in denial. Act like it will probably never happen, even though you know damn well it will. Tell no one, and refuse to discuss it with your spouse.

STEP TWO: Cry. Cry all the time. Feel a relentless weight in your chest. Wonder when you will run out of tears. Feel certain that you cannot handle it, and focus only on the potentially worst outcome of sending your husband to a warzone. Incur stress-related physical ailments because of this.

STEP THREE: Finally embrace reality, but do so with anger. Treat him like a leper because clearly, this is his fault. Wonder why he chose this profession, which the whole world views as noble and selfless, but leaves families aching and lonely. Fail to feel the same pride and gratitude the rest of the world bestows upon him so freely.

STEP FOUR: Fight. A lot. Cry some more.

STEP FIVE: Wake up. Recognize how much time you are wasting, and want to do better. Stuff all the negative as far down as you can. Wonder if that's healthy or not, but do it anyway. Realize that the support system you have is remarkable, because, HEY! it includes God.

STEP SIX: Utilize this Divine resource to find strength that you otherwise lack.

STEP SEVEN: Cry some more, just out of habit.

STEP EIGHT: Look for ways to increase the quality of the time you have to spend together. Tell him exactly what you need from him emotionally, in order to deal with everything. Quit being a selfish, whiny little brat. But also acknowledge that you are justified in having been that way, because if you pretend to be something you're not, you will need more therapy.

STEP NINE: Gently remind him, when he is lost in the chaos of his current work life, that you are still here, still wanting to connect, and still a teeny bit panicky inside. Watch him respond like a champ. Thank God for playing a role in that.

STEP TEN: Get ready to set up a How To Survive The Actual Deployment plan. Cry as needed, but add in some smiling as well. Let your friends know that this is going to happen in your life, and that you would love some extra TLC over the next year. Invite them to visit, check in on you, or help you out however they can. Then be willing to accept it when they offer.


So that's it, in a nutshell. There's probably tons more I could add, but for crying out loud, ten steps is already overwhelming to me.

And again, thanks to Christie for actually motivating me to blog. I can find time to blog about anything if I just have to break it down into "how to" steps!