Not Showing My Face...book

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrlSkU0TFLs&feature=related
(sorry, the embed code is wrong, so i can only put up the link. but check it out. if you haven't seen it, you should.)

I'm sure everyone has seen this video clip by now. Every time I see it, I crack up. It's perfect! I've been really intrigued by facebook lately. Let me put up my apologetic disclaimer straight off: if you enjoy facebook, good for you. I don't think any less of you for using it, not that it matters what I think of you.

I just find it to be the stupidest thing ever. Alright, alright, I can see how it's a fun way to keep connected to friends and family. And I will confess that out of curiousity, I checked it out. I asked my friend to let me on his page so I could see what it was all about. And I will admit that I laughed when I saw all the ridiculous pictures he had posted on there from high school. And the comments left by old friends were even funnier. I perused through his 389 friends, and saw a lot of people that I had completely forgotten about. But it was weird. There were moms of my high school friends on there. There were people I used to babysit. There were people I hadn't given thought to in literally twenty years.

So what's the point of it all? Are you really "friends" with all those people? If your nephew's girlfriend's brother "pokes" you, do you accept just to be polite? Why do you care what these people are doing? If there is a picture from high school 15 years ago of two people making out, and everyone is joking about it, is it really funny? I mean, I would not find any humor in seeing a picture of my husband making out with some girl from high school, and reading along while everyone reminisces about it. Do you feel better about yourself when your number of friends goes up, even if you don't like half the people you're friends with?

Here's the other thing. Remember Friendster? And then MySpace? Is Facebook the upgrade from each of those? They start off fine, and then people realize they can "pimp out" their page, and their header gets glitzier, their pictures get racier, and their friends get more and more ghetto. Facebook seems to be the suburban MySpace. Like the special place middle class white folks go to get away from the vermin infiltrating their previous social networking domain.

I get that online social networking is here to stay. And like I said, I can see where it could be fun. I think part of my irritation with the whole thing is that I really don't know why I despise it so much, and I am trying to find some legitimate arguement other than "It's so gay."

But gay it is, at least to me. And I will not be joining the masses. So Poke on, all you facebookers. Enjoy whatever it is that draws you to this bizarre pastime. But when your streamlined pages get cranked out with glam, when the high schoolers take over and start showing off their anatomy, when you start whining "There goes the neighborhood", don't say I didn't warn you.

And I'm sure the online community will devastated by my absence on Facebook. But hey, at least I'm on Blogger, right?

It stands for: Come On! Overpriced Produce

As I'm sure many people do, I have strong feelings about this:























So. My issue of the moment is the CO-OP. The natural, organic, earthy-crunchy stores across the country that tout all things biodegradable and sustainable. The stores that would have you believe your produce comes from this guy:

instead of this guy:

Ever been inside one of these places? I won't lie, their little cafe serves up THE BEST pesto roll with prosciutto that I've ever tasted. But somewhere amid the aisles and aisles of all things basil, tofu and democratic (yes, Virginia, there ARE politics in the produce) you can find stuff like this:

Flaxseed. If you know what to do with this stuff, I'm seriously impressed. I think it comes in my shampoo, but apparently other people eat it. Or who knows, maybe they're making their own shampoo.

I can't do the CO-OP because I cannot afford $2.50 for a tomato. I'll have to settle for the .34cent, insecticide-covered, cancer causing variety from WinCo. What a bummer! Care for some milk? If you don't mind paying $6.00 for the hormone-free gallon, head on down to your CO-OP! Otherwise, $2.79 for the kind from the cows on steroids. O.M.G! Does that lady have a plastic sack? Yes, I'm "re-using" which is on par with the "reduce, re-use, recycle" mantra, right? Ma'am, we'll have to ask you to leave. However, if you'd like to purchase this sustainable green "mother earth" tote for $5.00, you are welcome to use it to carry the 7 grocery items that actually fit into it out to your car.

How do people fall prey to this scam? Do they really feel that much better about themselves because they pay 9 times what I do for their groceries? If their kids behave well during grocery shopping, are they promised some of these?:

"Yes, honey, I WILL buy you some carob-coated raisins, but if you ask me again, the answer is NO."

I don't get it. I really don't. I've been living off of regular grocery food for about 35 years now, and frankly, I'm doin' alright. My farmers may not hug my eggplant before they ship it to me, but I'm also fairly certain they don't poison it either. I mean, I'm still alive, right?