Here are some primary difference between ME, and the girls I see walking on campus in the middle of winter.
1. Boots: My boots are designed for keeping my feet warm and dry, as
well as for providing traction on slick, icy surfaces.
Their boots are designed for Beyonce during a live Grammy performance.
2. Thighs: My thighs are all but bubble wrapped. Long underwear (you know the ones of which I speak...) and some nice toasty winter pants keep me from even thinking about the cold.
Their thighs: clearly exposed with miniskirts. Don't tell me those "tights" are keeping out the chill. I can see their skin is raw and windburned.
3. Hair: For all intents and purposes, I could very well be bald. Not a hair on my head can be seen peeking out from under THIS scarf and hat, with the hood pulled up over the top.
Their hair: seriously cute do's. I, at times, even have hair envy. There are thick, chunky highlights; straight, shiny locks; even a few adorably casual up-do's.
4. The tan: Me: Remember the albino on Princess Bride? Yeah. Nice. I've come to embrace my outer causcasian.
Them: $25 a month gets you unlimited visits. So I guess when the legs aren't red and windburned, they're probably a very cute shade of light brown.
There was a time when I would've sacrificed warmth and sensibility for looking cute. Is it a sign of aging that I absolutely do not care what I look like, as long as I'm not freezing? I remember saying things like "I would NEVER be caught dead..." and now, here I am, alive and kicking, and bundled up like the abominable snowman. And as white as him too. I'll take that any day over no feeling in my extremities and impending skin cancer. Being older has its perks.
15 comments:
I can tell I am too far removed from my college days because of very similar observances.
I have to admit, I tried a lot harder to look good back in those days. I never did tan though. I'm with you, skin cancer is too serious, especially since I had a chunk of it removed from my breast (how did that even get there?).
next on martha corinna's secrets revealed: i tanned topless in my twenties...
you're preaching to the choir girl. remember, my second home is a college campus...in sunny california nonetheless. Not only that but only 25% are caucasian and i'd say at least 3/4 of them tan to look like their multicultural classmates. Walking by the girlies on this campus is like watching a miss universe pageant. great for the ego.
Thanks for the email.
Maybe for my next post I'll post the pictures of my summer on the beaches of Nice where I bathed like the French do:)
I cannot believe people still tan. Do they hand out cigarettes before they go to their booth? Do the girls wear seatbelts on the way home?
What do you do in class if you aren't scamming on the boys??? Are you actually learning something? Ugh.
Yeah...I've started to listen to church music NOT ONLY ON SUNDAY. I'm a grandma. Your warm, pale and slipless self will quite at home with me.
I'm with you on the albino skin. I haven't learned to embrace it yet though. I DO NOT go tanning but I've been using the tanning lotions. I hope someday to embrace my whiteness like you have learned to do. I think it's great not to care. I would so rather be warm myself than cute. I HATE cold.
I yell at people that I think are driving too fast. Of course they can't hear me, so I do big hand motions that signal "SLOW DOWN.."
I'm sure they are driving by going "What in the world is that lady doing? And why is she surrounded by crying children?"
I find myself wandering into the front yard to check the mail or take out the garbage. I realize as I reach the mailbox that I'm still wearing my frumpy pajamas and look quite ridiculous. I feel like I should be embarrassed, but I do it again the very next day. I'm with you...comfort over looks any day!
That was an awesome post...I loved the Beyonce comment.
I don't care about looking cool anymore...I am my own brand of overweight, frumpy, soccer mom cool, I guess.
I too notice these 'little girls', but I must say, I get yelled at by by hubby for 'are you going to wear that?" "you're going to be cold". but hey... I'm cute right? That's what I'm thinking in my head at least.
sigh.
I haven't been to a college campus recently but I did go to church on Sunday and I could have written this exact post but not about single college girls, about other mommy's! Hey, I'm not even about warm, I'm just about comfort. When I have to walk acroos the parking lot balaning 2 kids, a diaper bag, lesson book and matrials, everyone's scriptures and whatever else was forgotten in the car, I'm not thinking boots or hair or legs or tan. I'm thinking survival, and as I look at others cuteness, I just remember when I was younger and then I cry over my patheticness. Cute post!
The difference between them and us...we know who we are and we have what they really want. "MAUWAGE" & "TWU WUV"!
I worked at the Univ. of Oregon for almost five years. My favorite part of the year was when the Spring came and all the sorority girls' beer bellies oozed over their jean tops. Crazy thing is that they meant to show off that belly with shorter shirts. At least their bellies were tan.
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