Saturday, May 8, 2010

Consider This The Hint of the Century

I had the occasion to spend four hours in the car with my firstborn this week. I took advantage of the obvious teaching moments, and hooked us up with a little ipod playlist that I like to call "Still Livin In High School." Oh, it's classic. Classic. It includes such artists as Bon Jovi, Biz Markie, Salt-n-Pepa, Skid Row, Guns n Roses, Slick Rick, REM, Digital Underground, and I won't lie... a little Wrex n Effex.
I am pleased to report that said child knew many of the lyrics to these richly historical tunes. I felt accomplished as a parent. I was so inspired, in fact, that I decided to school him in the fine art of vehicular vocalizing. The rules are as follows:

1. Sing. Really, really loudly.

I cannot understand how it's possible that from day to day, I have difficulty remembering where I put my shoes, when I am in charge of carpool, or whether or not I put on deodorant... and yet... every word from every song comes back to me with a clarity that is not to be believed. And suddenly, I want to dance. I want to shake what my mama gave me, and driving becomes secondary in importance to my performance. I can only think of channeling my inner Axl.
Thank goodness I have that sweet son o' mine to keep me in line. After a few minutes of slack-jawed horror, he finally snapped me back to reality by saying, "Mom. You should probably settle down before you throw your back out again."
And just like that, Axl has left the building.

20 comments:

Steven Rosbach said...

I have often said that I'm a very, very good singer, so long as Dave Grohl is singing back-up louder than I am.

Clair said...

Just one rule? You were on a roll and I wanted more. I'm also disappointed that Slaughter didn't make the playlist cut.

Rynell said...

That's one smart kid you've got there.

ABSOLUTELY NORMAL CHAOS said...

I just don't understand why they don't think we look good when we bust a move. I don't understand why they get embarrassed, when we really know what we're doin. I know how to shake shake shake. shake shake shake, shake my booty!!

Lauren in GA said...

Not lying...I snorted when I burst out in laughter as I read how he suggested that you settle down before throwing your back out...again.

...and the parting shot of, "Axl has left the building." was utterly fantastic.

I am glad you have your priorities in proper order. I agree, driving should become secondary and shaking what your mama gave ya (totally loved reading that, too) should be top priority.

Robin said...

You are an awesome mom! Happy Rockin' Mother's Day!

katyvee said...

I love that I am COMPLETELY tone deaf.. yet when caught singing at the TOP of my lungs, which is on a daily basis.. my 4-year-old often comments: "You could be on American Idol.. if you were younger." So even when her sweet little head hears my awful voice as something of worth.. it's obvious, even to her.. that I'm WAY too old for the gig.
Rock on.. sista.

Trinity (of haiku tofu) said...

With a comeback like that, you know he's your kid. You taught him well. Happy Mother's Day!

martha corinna said...

Before you throw your back out. That's awesome.

I channel my inner Axl while I'm cooking dinner.

Next time I see you I'll be sure to ask your if you'd like to hear a little GnR.

Tristan said...

LOL

Settle down there Andrea! That's so awesome!

Nothing better than singing in the car with your kids! It makes me smile and truly enjoy life!

calibosmom said...

Classic. Getting old is hard. I declared a "bum war" on the trampoline today and my stamina is shot!

Annemarie said...

You are one cool mom. So glad you didn't throw your back out...

♥Shally said...

The best is when you are in the car next to the mom singing her guts out as the kids sit in horror.

Wish I could have seen it. :)

My kids are all still young enough to want to belt it all out with me. My day of embarrassing them is still on the horizon...

Ilene said...

Ah, the joys of having young kids. They still think I can dance and sing.

It will be sad day for my ego when they realize that their mother is tone deaf and the white groove-challenged genes run deep.

Melissa said...

Loved this. Loved it. Hope you had a happy Mother's Day. :)

The Prestwich's said...

haha! Too funny. Brody screams bloody murder whenever I sing in the car. No joke. He took away my one true joy. Er..umm...I mean one of several.

jessica said...

I would have been rockin' out right there with you sista! I introduced my 17 yr old cousin to my "old school" playlist while I was in ND. Now I have to make him a CD...his favorite...Poison, Every Rose has it's Thorn...aahhh yeahhhh.

Travelin'Oma said...

I think most of my bonding moments took place in the car listening to music. It made me feel young and the kids liked me better that way.

Lauren in GA said...

I am still laughing about the fact that he told you that you should, "settle down".

lishajeanne said...

That. is. Awesome. All of it.