My Current Top Ten: The Double Edged Sword Edition

I am feeling all energetic and zippy today. And when I feel like this, it's always fun to make a list. So today's list is going to be regarding the Top Ten Things That Currently Annoy Me But Still Make Me Laugh.

1. The codependent relationship my cat is developing with me. Funny thing is, though, the "co" part in "codependent" is misleading, as I do not feel the need to watch her shower, lay in her lap 24-7, nuzzle my nose in her neck while she is studying, or mew sadly when she leaves the room.

2. People on Facebook who post or mass message saying, "Message me your address if you want a Christmas card!" Really? No offense to all of you who have done that to me. But do you stop to think how that makes the recipient feel? "I don't really care enough about you to private message you and ask for your address, but while I'm at it, why not give me a nice ego stroke and ask me to send you a Christmas card, so I know how badly you want to hear me brag about my kids." I'm just sayin.

3. Stupid soldiers. Stupid soldiers, and there is indeed such a thing, are the ones who perform their jobs poorly and put my husband in a bad mood and increase his workload. You're all stuck over there in that hell hole, why not just do your job, do it well, make it easier on one another, and then come home.
*This one annoys me, but doesn't make me laugh.

4. Elf on the Shelf.

5. Oatmeal raisin cookies. It's annoying because could there be a bigger letdown? You get a plate of cookies, they smell delish, you take a bite, and there's no chocolate and barely any sugar. For real? It's funny because they're cookies, and you have to laugh because if you get angry at cookies, you have bigger issues than disappointing flavors.

6. Oddly packaged toys that I have to wrap for my kids this Christmas. Think: basketball in half a box, hexbug arena, anything Nerf. The annoying is obvious, as I curse at the torn paper, oddly folded corners, excessive tape, and hideous end result. Why is this funny? Because wouldn't YOU laugh at me if you were watching? Yes. Yes you would.

7. Occupiers. People who invade public spaces, use them as toilets, beds and eateries all at once, and act as if they are passionate for a cause are ANNOYING. They are funny, however, because have you heard them speak? Way to be educated on what it is you’re even doing there…

8. Kardashians.

9. Coach bags. Annoying, because who the hell cares? Funny, because now I can laugh at you for being pretentious.

10. And let’s bring it full circle… back to the cat. Watching her scratch her neck while wearing her cone. The constant click of her claws on the plastic… annoying. But seeing her think that sooner or later, she’ll get the itch? That’s kinda funny.

So there you have it. I've discovered that if you laugh at things, you can often prevent them from weighing you down. So let's all whistle a little Bobby McFerrin and revel in the insanity.