This morning, the knocks came at 6:30 and again at 6:45. "What's fifteen minutes?" you may ask. Fifteen minutes is three 5-minute intervals of sleep, and I demand every bit of it. My initial response was to scream at my door "I'M SLEEPING IN HERE!! GO AWAY!" But I tried that all last week, and clearly it's not working.
Enter My Brilliance. I ignored the knocks and stayed in bed until 7:00. Then I got up, got dressed, and calmly walked downstairs.
"Good morning, children."
"Hi mom!"
"What time did you knock on my door this morning?"
"6:30," says one.
"6:45," says the other. (Are you as aghast as I that they were keenly aware of this??)
"Hmmm. Is that BEFORE or AFTER 7:00?"
"After?"
"Yes. What's the rule about mornings?"
"Don't wake you up until after 7:00 on school days?"
"Yes. What time will you be going to bed tonight?"
"The regular time?"
"Welllll... no. I will need some extra time for myself this evening, as you both took time away from me this morning. Noe, you may go to bed at 6:30 tonight; Keola, you may go at 6:45. In the future, whatever time you knock on my door will be the time you go to bed in the evening. How does that work for you?"
"It sucks."
"Do we use that word in our house?"
"No ma'am."
"Thank you. Enjoy the rest of your breakfast."
Please. Hold your applause. I'm trying to take a victory nap.
16 comments:
Brilliant
Nice. I'm banking that one.
And the brilliant thing about it as that I know you were as cool as a cucumber...
Beautifully done.
You should write a book.
Now that was priceless haha. Love it!
I bow to your awesomeness.
That was awesome! We do surprise ourselves some times by acting rationally...don't you love when that happens!
I totally enjoyed reading this, but since I've always been a "rest of the story" kind of person, am I the only one who's dying to know WHY they risked "the wrath of khandrea" (love that!) by knocking on your door before 7 a.m.? I mean, the house obviously wasn't on fire, and there were no bloody noses or broken limbs or I assume they would've been a little more persistent, but did anyone ever try to give an explanation for the brazen disregard of your rule? Just curious..
Bowing down as well. You are awesome!
alison...
noe wanted to say "hi" and ask me to dry her hair, since she decided to wake up at SIX A.M. and TAKE A BATH. weird.
keola wanted to give me a picture he had drawn for me.
all sweet and kind gestures in spirit, but in practical application: epic failures.
All I can EVER come up with is: "that drained my energy" and I always think "Andrea would have something so much more intelligent to do here..."
Please write a book and put this post in it. Everyone will buy it, you will be a millionaire, and morning wake-up crises all over the world will be solved. You. are. a. genius.
I know I'm doing it all wrong cause I don't even have enough energy most days to say, "that drained my energy." I've said it before and I'll say it again, "YOU ARE THE L&L ROCK STAR!" I'm still learning. Good thing I have you to admire.
I seriously take notes when you do posts like this. BRILLIANT! I'm using this tactic!
You are a genius...and incredibly funny. I so loved the victory lap parting comment.
Seriously...so genius.
That is brilliant! You are such a clever parent!
Can I tell you how much I LOVED this post?! I am the same way and this morning I was absolutely giddy because my kids didn't wake me up until 7:15 instead of the customary 6:45. Half an hour is a huge difference. You are hilarious.
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